Have you heard that you have problems communicating? From your parents or roommate or jealous boyfriend in a rage? Communication is KEY to every relationship we have in our lives. And if you don’t know how to do it, you are in trouble. You’ll end up isolated. And no one wants that. Whether you are shy or quick to get angry you must work out a way to communicate better with others. Not only for their sake but for yours.

You have needs that need to be met as they do too. The only way to make sure all needs are being met is to communicate better.

Here’s my 4 step Stir Fry recipe to make that happen.

When you find yourself in a conversation that isn’t going well. Whether it’s becoming a fight or you are not saying what you want to say. Here’s what you need to do:

Step 1: Stop talking

Step 2: Listen

Step 3: Think about a reply. And think how your reply will sound before you say it.

Step 4: Reply

Practice these steps while making my stir fry, you’ll get a great meal out of the deal and learned how you can better communicate through practice!


  •  3 T coconut or olive oil
  •  1 lb chicken breast, sliced ¼ inch thick
  •  1 large onion, sliced
  •  2 bell green and red peppers, sliced
  •  ½ cup frozen broccoli chopped
  • 1 medium carrot, finely chopped
  •  3 cloves garlic, minced
  •  1 T fresh ginger, minced
  •  ½ c fresh cilantro, chopped
  •  ¼ c fresh lime juice
  •  ¼ c low-sodium soy sauce
  •  3 T honey
  •  2 t sesame oil
  •  Salt and pepper to taste



1. Heat a large skillet over high heat with coconut or olive oil on the stove top. During this step

repeat to yourself the following steps: Step 1: Stop talking, Step 2: Listen, Step 3: Think

about a reply. And think how your reply will sound before you say it, Step 4: Reply


2. When the oil is almost smoking, add the chicken, onions and bell peppers to the pan. Season

liberally with salt and pepper, and let sauté for 2-3 minutes, stirring frequently. The smaller you

slice your chicken the quicker it will cook. During this step I want you to think about the most

recent uncomfortable conversation you had. Say to yourself, which step did you fail? Did

you not listen or reply too soon? Think about it and get honest with yourself.


3. Add the broccoli, garlic and ginger to the pan. Continue to sauté, stirring frequently for another 2-

3 minutes. During this step ask yourself, if you could have changed the conversation, what

would you have done differently and said differently?


4. While this is cooking, mix together the sauce ingredients.


5. When the chicken is cooked through, add your sauce to the pan. Mix well to combine and

continue to cook for another 2-3 minutes, or until your veggies have reached your desired

tenderness. If you like some crunch then they will only cook for a few more minutes. During this

step practice the conversation again. Take on both parts, what you said and what the other

person said with using your new changes to the conversation. Practice this out loud. Don’t

worry, you’re alone in the kitchen no one will hear you or care that you are talking to



6. Remove from the heat, toss in the fresh cilantro and drizzle with sesame oil and serve over rice!

Now that you have practiced your new conversation and know what you would have said

differently, decide if it’s worth having the conversation again with that person. Do you

want to call them? Text them and try again? While you are eating and enjoying this stir fry

you could easily have this new and improved conversation and you’ll feel so much better

about yourself now that you’ve learned some simple tools for how to communicate better.



— Allison